Jun 17, 2015

Goodnight,

Late night thoughts, somehow, is not good for me health. Torturing me mind, giving extra pain to me own soul. Demm.

What will you do
when all you have is your own self,
waiting the pain
to leave (?)

What will you do
when all you feel
is somehow
getting through your nerves
every second
you breathe (?)

"Endure it. One day, you will feel nothing. Time heals, you know"

Easy say bruh?

Just try to have at least a thought
and mix it with a heart - -

This is the situation - - -

You do nothing. You are enjoying every little moment in your day. Having all happy time shielding yourself from any bad things. Keeping yourself as busy as the busiest human being just to forget that you have this one kind of killer pain. You are succeed, at first attempt, maybe.

Walking along the dead dreams like a boss, dancing with those monsters created by yesterday's nightmares.

But, for some hidden reasons, you just broken, into pieces.
The floor couldnt touch your legs.
Might feel nothing but painful - - & it is enough to make you drown-ing.

Drowning.

No one is there.
Got no hand to reach.
Have no voice to say any 'supportive' words.
None exists.

Painful, isnt?

I mean,
not for being alone but
to feel this kind of pain while others think
you are okay
you are strong
you are good enough to
get through these.

***


It comes, again.

"Why dont you just take the medicine & have some sleep?"

Coz it is not easy
to eat those pills
& black out.

Enough,
I dont want to wake up
& me is on a white bed
with a doctor beside
asking "Tell me,whats you pain scale?"

Nope, not again.


My dear left lumbar spondylosis, can you just leave me alone? ;_;